BY: M. TOMOSKI
With the election of the outrageous new Philippine president Rodrigo Duterte, many have been calling him the Trump of the East. But in the city of Davao, where Duterte has been mayor for 22 years, he is better known as, “the Punisher.” Elected for his tough-on-crime stance and the violent methods he used as mayor, Duterte has promised to deal with the country’s crime in three to six months by killing 100,000 criminals.
To do so, he would have to bring back the death penalty, which was banned in the Philippines in 2006, but his idea of double hanging criminals (once to kill them and again to decapitate the corpse) should keep him right on track for what he’s claimed is an ideal kill-count of 5 criminals a week.
Duterte once claimed that “For every profanity, there’s a story behind it. People should go beyond my cussing.” But both he and Trump have proven that their profanities can definitely mis-speak for themselves.
So which is worse?
On Border Issues
TRUMP: “We’re going to do a wall. We’re going to have a big, fat beautiful door on the wall. We’re going to have people come in, but they’re going to come in legally…Mexico’s going to pay for the wall.”
DUTERTE: “I will ride a jet ski [to the Spratly islands claimed by China] while bringing the Philippine flag.”
On Terrorism
TRUMP: “We’re fighting a very politically correct war…And the other thing is with the terrorists, you have to take out their families. They, they care about their lives—don’t kid yourself—but they say they don’t care about their lives. You have to take out their families.”
DUTERTE: “I admit I am 100 per cent terrorist but I am terrorizing only the drug pushers, kidnappers, hold-up gangs and other criminals…Kidnappers, drug pushers from other places, I dare you to come over here so that I can finish you off.”
On Crime
TRUMP: “One of the first things I’d do in terms of executive order, if I win, will be to sign a strong, strong statement that would go out to the country, out to the world, anybody killing a police man, a police woman, a police officer, anybody killing a police officer, the death penalty is going to happen.”
DUTERTE: “Forget the laws on human rights. If I make it to the presidential palace, I will do just what I did as mayor. You drug pushers, hold-up men and do-nothings, you better go out. Because I’d kill you…I’ll dump all of you into Manila Bay, and fatten all the fish there.”
On Women
TRUMP: “There has to be some form of punishment, [for women who get abortions]”
(among several other things Trump has said about women)
DUTERTE: “They raped all of the women… There was this Australian lay minister… when they took them out… I saw her face and I thought, ‘Son of a bitch. what a pity… they raped her, they all lined up. I was mad she was raped but she was so beautiful. I thought, the mayor should have been first.”
On the Pope
TRUMP: “I say only that this man is not Christian.”
“If and when the Vatican is attacked by ISIS, which, as everyone knows, is ISIS’s ultimate trophy, the pope can have only wished and prayed that Donald Trump would have been president because this would not have happened.”
DUTERTE: “We were affected by the traffic. It took us five hours. I asked why, they said it was closed. I asked who is coming. They answered, the Pope. I wanted to call him: “Pope, son of a whore, go home. Do not visit us again.”
On Family
TRUMP: “I don’t think Ivanka would [pose for Playboy], although she does have a very nice figure. I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”
DUTERTE: “None of my children are into illegal drugs. But my order is, even if it is a member of my family, ‘kill him.’”
On Their Junk
TRUMP: “[Marco Rubio] referred to my hands and said, ‘If they’re small, something else must be small,’ and I guarantee you there’s no problem. There’s no problem.”
DUTERTE: “I was separated from my wife. I’m not impotent. What am I supposed to do? Let this hang forever? When I take Viagra, it stands up.”